Fridays here usually focus on the Arts. Mothering is an Art. And my Mother was a work of Art. And right now, I'm missing her a hell of a lot. (And no she wouldn't approve of me saying h-e-double-hockey sticks here.) I'm not missing my mother–who died at Christmastime in 2008, one-and-a-half years ago–because this is Mother's Day Weekend. Although, I'm sure I will remember her this weekend and experience a heart-felt twinge or two.
Perhaps my missing Mother right now is a bit selfish. Is that really so bad? Our mothers mean and provide so much for us, if we are blessed so. Sometimes what they mean to us, including me, is not always 100 percent hunky-dorey. After all, mothers–I know too well, now that I am one–are flawed human beings.
I miss the ways she contributed to my life and made it better. How sometimes she made it flow smoother. Like right now. Right now, mother, I really need you. I'm moving soon. From the time I graduated college until I settled into this home 16 years ago, I moved eight times in 12 years. Four cities, one of them (this one,) twice. From post college summer job to real job. From apartment to apartment to another city and another apartment to first home, to another home. To another city and another apartment to this home that I'm leaving now.
Mother would travel up through the mountains and meet me in Tennessee or down through the banks of Georgia red clay and meet me in Atlanta. She's not going to meet me this time. She couldn't have even if she was still alive. Her last 12 years found her increasingly unable to travel. But when she could, she came. She packed, she organized. She hung pictures. She expertly arranged. She was an interior decorator.* Within days, magically, any apartment, any home, was settled. And, oh, how I miss that. And. I miss you, too, mother.
Happy Mother's Day. I love you.
Other posts on mother here, here, here and here.
*Mother did not have a degree in interior design, so technically she was a "decorator." As mentioned in this post, she was also a residential home builder.
Thanks for stopping by my blog, and taking the time to comment 🙂
Daughter/mother relationships are wonderful and wonderfully complicated, aren’t they?
Although it is only an ocean that physically separates me from my mother at the moment, your words made me feel a real twinge of longing for someone who just ‘gets’ me.
Well, a Happy Mother’s Day to you… I hope you have a wonderful day with your family!
Thank you for this sweet reflection, Luna Pie.