This young woman-girl-child. Wise in her own way. Whole, perfect and complete. Just the way she is. As am I, as are you. Ever was, ever will be….
She lives in a state of pure, innocent joy. I captured this spontaneous heartfelt ear-to-ear grin of gratitude as we started up a park hill. She’s not able to articulate the reason for her joy. I can only guess: life, loving the one whom she’s with, being outside, the act of walking, returning to a familiar place….Understanding Grace and her autism—any and all could be the answer. If I were to ask, most likely she’d say: FUN!
This afternoon, the eve of Thanksgiving, her joyful simplicity reminded me to grateful. We rounded a familiar bend as I watched the sun sink from a blue sky into layers of melon and gold. We approached two familiar barren trees that stood like sentinels to the path between them. We walk this road more so in winter because the majority is warmed by sun.
I’m reminded every time I approach those two trees, which stand alone in a grassy field, of the many winters I bundled in hat, scarf, gloves and a puffy down coat and walked this path alone—either alone emotionally, though I walked with a former partner, or alone in my tears grieving the loss of a partner.
I’m grateful for the passage of time that took me through those seasons of heartache. I’m grateful for the lessons learned, for the growth they carved. Those painful times are not unlike the times we are navigating now. I learned back then to mine the joy where I could find it. I could not ignore the balm of beauty even during the periods I walked alone, broken hearted and in tears. Our lives are in some ways frozen like those winters of the past. Isolation is real. Loneliness, for some, also, too real. Longing for people, things and traditions sort of bruises our already COVID-battered hearts. But, if we are wise like Grace, we find the joy. Simple joy. It’s here. Look for it. I know you can find it. I certainly did and do.
Grateful this thanks.giving. Grateful, though, if I had my druthers, I’d rather be traveling somewhere. Nevermind. What is, is….I am grateful for what I do have. I woke up Monday with the thought: concentrate on abundance versus scarcity. And, this mantra of sorts, above, came to me yesterday morning—stay grounded in gratitude. Indeed. I want to let gratitude be my grounding. Gratitude is a state of abundance.
Namaste. May you find peace within, a smidgen of hope for better times, and a few nuggets of joy this holiday. —xxL
